confused.

Lifeee..

Life is so hard at times. It confuses me. Really it does! Right now I feel really lost and don't know what to do. At some point I feel like I just want to go home where I don't have to worry about things so much. Being here on your own, sometimes it sucks! I mean I love learning to be independent but when you push yourself to hard you're gonna lose it at some point. And let's just say I'm really really close to that.

After all the things I've been through I've realized that I'm not as strong as I thought I was. Geezzzz. Maybe I shouldn't be putting myself down like that. But it's true. Ci iflin said that women are like tea bags. you don't know how strong a woman is until you put her into hot water. And hot water meaning facing problems and all that enchaladaa that goes with it! I feel like I've been dipped into hot water and pulled back then dipped into it again. So me being strong is not constant. Sometimes I can be real strong but sometimes I'm just pure WEAK!

It kind of sucks too how all the problems I'm facing have to do with moneyy! Have u realized that most problems in the world are coz of money? Well I have! I'm stressing with hearing about how tuition is all going up and with the economy crisis going on who know's if rent is gonna be more expensive and prices of food going up?! I feel bad for my dad. I actually have thought of quitting school just because I don't want my dad to stress about sending me money all the time. Which he has been forgetting to do. Or being late at sending me money. It's been tough on all of us I guess. I'm sorryy dadddyy! :( If only money grew on trees! haha.

Anywayy besides all thatt.. todayy it was tusuk sate day at church! we're preparing for our summer fair in june. Which is like a month from now. and I think they are all crazy for preparing the sate from now! haha. gudluck to them tho! hopefully the meat will still be good. hahaha. We made like about 1500 sate's today! Mann my hands were tired after thatt. But it was kind of funn. hehe. So right now I'm in a dilemma. To sleep or not to sleepp? hahaha. I want to sleep but I'm not sleepyy. This has become a very very bad habit. Sleeping late everyday. Hopefully this will go away sometime soon. hahaha. But I guess that's it for todayy! PEACE OUT!